Express Grattitude

Lately, for sometime I had walked home everyday thinking how grateful I am for the people I have in my life. I was thinking just now, how do I show it? - Does it need to be shown/expressed?

I should always express myself. Express myself now, not later, cause really what's the wait?

Work toward your goals in life. Never plan a minute detail - life is too unpredictable.

So... take baby steps.
And a couple baby steps later...
You'll eventually get there

One thing I learned: Walls are there to be taken down.
We all have these walls/obstacles
But, like in reality, no wall is impossible to break down.
It's a matter of how bad you want it!

You have one life,
just one chance.
Fight whatever obstacles lay ahead of you
Becasue, you only get one life, one chance...

Another thing: HOPE
Remember that even if you feel lke there's no hope, you can still make someone's hope come true

and sometimes... it's something really really simple.

Do you know what the American Dream is?
hint: it's not wealth homes, cars, etc
the ORIGINAL AMERICAN DREAM was coined by:
James Truslow Adams
in
"The Epic America"

"It is not a dream of motor cars and high wages merely, but a dream of social order in which each man and each woman shall be able to attain to the fullest stature of which tey are innately capable, and be recognied by others for what htey are, regardless of circumstances of birth or position"

"Legacy: The Giving of Life's Greatest Treasures" by Barrie Sanford Freiff, MD

Life your life to leave a Legacy
Basing it on the 9 L's

1 Legacy, we should live to leave a legacy to affect those we care most about
2 Loving, Let the people you love, know you love them. Don't be afraid to love yourself & Make time to do the things you love
3 Learning, Learn to cope with life's challenges. Acquire the wisdom necessary to remain strong... without learning, we can't help those we love
4 Laboring, Life is hard, but that doesn't mean you give up. Work brings out a better in us, and helps us appreciate the small things in life
5 Laughing & Lamenting, Remember to laugh & let loose & enjoy life. Remember to face grief and express it... it's that simple...
6 Linking, We don't meet people by handshakes alone. We're brought together by ideas, hopes, passions, stories and memories. Cherish them.
7 Living, "A well lived life is a life of risk." Don't be afraid to live your life, and really, don't dwell on the "if's" of life
8 Leading
9 Leaving, We all end up leaving friends and loved ones... Lead a life so that they would neer forget your legacy.

Life your life,
for yourself
and live it the best you can!

Kind Words From Chun Chua Yun

Bubbly. Fun-loving. Joyous. Cheerful. Sweet memories Sandy brings, now and always. A true girlfriend whose always there, never fails to keep this girl bond alive despite being thousands and thousands of miles away and having a 24hour time difference between us. Nothing stops this girl! She is ever-loving, ever-optimistic and encouraging best girlfriend. Yet sharp and smart, she always plays the advisory role when it comes to responding to me pleas. Though so many miles apart, she feels always near and ever close in my heart. Sandy i love you! :)

Music Speaks to Me

This song speaks to me:

Des'ree
Gotta Be
Big Sing 2008

Oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh

Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Others they may cause your tears
Go ahead release your fears
Stand up and be counted don't be shamed to cry

You gotta be, you gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day

Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, love will save the day

Herald what your mother said
Read the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view
My, oh, my, hey hey hey

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day

Time asks no questions it goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning can't stop it if you tried to
The best part is danger staring you in the face
Whoa

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day


Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Others they may cause your tears
Go ahead release your fears
My, oh, my, hey, hey, hey

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day

You got to be bold, you got to be bad
You got to be wise, don't ever say it
You got to be hard, not too too hard
All I know is love will save the day

Love, love, love will save the day
Love, love, love will save the day
Love, love, love will save the day
Love, love, love will save the day

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save...

The day

Oooh, oooh
Oooh, oooh, oooh oooh, oooh

Friends

I'd been feeling really down about boys and school, particularly boys.

MY FRIENDS,
THEY LEND ME THEIR STRENGTH

SO I MAY BE BETTER :D

I thought about this and thought about the Sailor Moon song - Carry On - when she goes up against the evil Queen whatever-her-name-is-I-forget.

Here I'm standing in the night,
My crescent wand's the only light.
Alone against my darkest fears,
But I sense my friends are here.
I'll draw from each of the power I need,
The evil Queen we will defeat.

Give me the strength to carry on.
With all our love we can't go wrong.
Only together we face the fight.
Nothing can stand against our might.

(music)

Give me the strength to carry on.
With all our love we can't go wrong.
Only together we face the fight.
Nothing can stand against our might.

With all our strength the battle's won.
With all our love we can't go wrong.
We have the strength to carry on.

Current Situation

There's several, perhaps many, things I found well to be an issue. They are past issues, my perhaps baggage as some may say - though it sounds sooo negative - these are a past that I realize in the past I have thought about talked about it briefly and found some sort of resolve in that moment. But I realize, what I did was just suppress it. Why? How? Because I didn't know how to deal and I had more important things to engross myself in and I belittled my own problems as they paled in comparison to the morbidity and mortality of loved ones, of my friends' problems, at the world's problems. But I realize - to each his own. Everyone has their problems. More importantly, everyone has a story, and everyONE has some wisdom to offer/give. What is mine to give? I give my kindness, genuinity and friendliness in hopes for a good time, in hopes to brighten the day.
What I most long for is to belong. To perhaps belong in the embrace of a man, and stand as his backbone, his pillar of strength, behind every good man is a woman. But I want friends, I want a life. I want to be me. I want to discover myself. I want to get in touch with me. SPC, Sandysan, San. I'm super smart, I can memroize tons of things, I'm going to be a great pharmacist emparting empathy and doing everything I can for others. In everythingi all I want to give 110, no 200% of myself because what you get what you put in. How much I put myself into something I can only be rewarded more and more. I"m a philosopher. I"m a linguist. I"m a Buddhist on the rise. I'm a runner at heart always. I've ran so far away from just everything. It's time to run back, kinda like to home, to "home" where I feel safe and comfortable in my skin. I"m productive, too. I like getting tons of stuff done. And I"m a great proponent of to get anything done it takes time and that I'll spend that time to acheive my goal(s).
Yesterday, I was a lil crazy and I tellin my friend, S, that I need to be ambitious and I need to be better, a better student, a person - she was like "WHAT Sandysaannn, you're already a good person I don't know what you're talkin' about." But I haven't shown the world I'm a good person. I must first make amends with myself.

Independence - Under Construction

Independence doesn’t mean you don’t need other people or care about what other people think about you. Independent people seek things which empower them (things that allow them to use their strengths) instead of things that enable them (things that allow them to defer their development).

Under Construction. And on the journey to REGAIN my independence that I've drifted so far from.

EDIT:
I got a fortune cookie (2/8/2010 on my birthday):
Others admire your independence.

I admire my own independence.

I need to read those Chicken Noodle Soup books!

for
Teenage Soul
Runners
Teacher Tales
Devotional Stories for Women
True Love
Teens Talk Relationships
Extraordinary Teens
Teens Talk Tough Times
Teens Talk Relationships
Teens Talk Growing Up
Tough Times Tough People

Dram-atic!

I like dramatic!

Not drama. Drama makes things not simple anymore.

Hah I was thinking this morning...
I was thinking about how the luxurious plush blanket I have is like those Asian blankets. I say like, like similar. Then I thought about what was on those: animals like tigers, phoenixes. And I thought it was funny, I was like I know why Eric wants those tattoos! He wants to be an Asian blanket!!! hahahahahhha I don't think I'll mention it to him for awhile?? Okay I told him. I just want to express what is on my mind.

I'm trying to have more meaningful relationships. Like rather than just doing stuff.

Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself.

Don't get complacent. It might be comfortable and fun being at the top of one level, but you've got to break through, you've got to get uncomfortable to continue to learn and achieve.

Ethanol

Ethanol
Why? – Asian flush
Ethanol is metabolised by the liver by alcohol dehydrogenase to acetaldehyde, then by aldehyde dehydrogenase to acetate.
In 50% of Asian people, an inactive genetic variant of one of the aldehyde dehydrogenase isoforms (ALDH-2) is expressed; these individuals experience a disulfiram-like reaction after alcohol, and the incidence of alcoholism in this group is extremely low.
In the presence of disulfiram, which produces no marked effect when given alone, ethanol consumption is followed by a severe reaction comprising flushing, tachycardia, hyperventilation, and considerable panic and distress, which is due to excessive acetaldehyde accumulation in the bloodstream.

Why – do we want to pee?!
Diuresis is caused by inhibition of antidiurectic hormone secretion, and tolerance develops rapidly, so that dieresis is not sustrained.

out of touch with who I am